What is Remediation

The word -remediation- is very important in the work my colleagues and I do with families affected by autism and other neuro-developmental disabilities, but it is a word that is unfamiliar to many people. I thought I would take a moment this week to talk about what remediation means in general, and specifically in the realm of autism.

Let’s start with some basic dictionary definitions:
Remediate (verb) – To remedy a problem
Remedial (adjective) – Intended to correct or improve one’s skill in a specific field; therapeutic, corrective, restorative
Remediation (noun) – Use of remedial methods to improve skills; the act or process of correcting a deficiency

Dr. Steven Gutstein’s definition of remediation: Correcting a deficit to the point where it no longer constitutes and obstacle

My definition: Work ON something, not just around it

Whether you are a parent or professional, it is critical to understand what remediation is, and the distinction between remediation and compensation. Perhaps the most common application of this distinction is in the area of reading problems. If a child is diagnosed with a reading disability, we typically apply remediation approaches to help them learn to read. At various points we may use compensations, such as books on tape, to support them. However, our goal is to remediate, or correct, the problem that is preventing them from reading so they can become functional readers. In my professional experience, I have yet to come across a situation where adults believe that if an 8 year old child is not yet reading, that we should just compensate for that and give them books on tape to listen to for the rest of their lives. Remedial efforts are taken to get to the root of the problem and overcome the issues that are preventing successful reading.

Now take this same concept and apply it to individuals on the autism spectrum. By definition they are struggling in many areas: socialization, communication, thinking flexibly, and the list goes on depending on the person. What approach do we usually take to these deficits? By and large, we take a compensation approach. We find ways to work around these problems so that the students fit into the mold of what we do at home and in school everyday. Our main motivation becomes applying strategies that help them exhibit what we consider to be -typical- behaviors -sit appropriately in the classroom or at church, learn academic skills, play on the playground equipment, wait in line without becoming upset, greet others when we see them, etc. While we may also look for ways to support their communication and to improve their relationships with others, we do this on a very surface level without really understanding the obstacles that create those problems in the first place. And, because we don’t really understand the root issues that create these problems, we resort to compensation techniques rather than remediating the root causes.

When you look at the history of treatments in the field of autism, it has been primarily about compensation. While research on the brain and autism has continued to move forward and provide us new information, our treatment approaches have stagnated. The methods we were using 30 years ago are still the methods being used today, despite the fact that we have a whole host of new information available to us. We now have the capacity to take what we know about the disorder of autism and how it impacts brain function, and develop new techniques and approaches that move beyond compensation and actually work to remediate (correct) the primary features of the disorder. This is one of the exciting things about newer approaches such as the Relationship Development Intervention (RDI) Program, which focuses on remediating, rather than just working around, the core deficits we see in individuals with autism and other neuro-developmental disorders.

It is time to move beyond thinking about treatment as merely capitalizing on strengths, and begin thinking about how to strengthen areas of weakness. Research has shown us that autism is primarily a disorder of connectivity in the brain-with some portions over connected and others under connected. What is so exciting about this is that we know that neural connectivity can change throughout the lifespan. The human brain has an enormous capacity for developing new connections and changing the patterns of connectivity when given the right types of stimulation. This is what allows us to look at autism treatment in a new light. It cannot be merely about strengthening the areas that are already strong. Effective education and treatment must be focused on building new connections in the areas where connectivity is deficient. This is the essence of remediation.

About the Author: Autism specialist Nicole Beurkens, founder and director of the Horizons Developmental Remediation Center, provides practical information and advice for families living with autism and other developmental disabilities. If you are ready to reduce your stress level, enrich your child’s development, and improve your family’s quality of life, get your FREE reports now at ==> www.HorizonsDRC.com

How To Cope With Loneliness In Your Long Distance Relationship

The weekends and times around the holidays can prove especially hard for those in a long distance relationship. You may feel like others who are coupled are having the time of their life, all wrapped up and cozy with their loved one. Accepting the fact that you will have periods of loneliness is the first step towards working to overcome them!

It is important to recognize the chain of events that cause feelings of loneliness to set in. This can be doing an activity by yourself that you may usually associate doing as a couple such as seeing a movie, dining out, or viewing a favorite show on TV. By recognizing why you are feeling lonely, you can then work towards meaningful activities that will minimize the loneliness as well as encourage your growth and strength as an individual.

Your long distance relationship can suffer if your emotional needs are not met. As can happen in any relationship, we can become so preoccupied with managing the relationship as a couple, that we neglect ourselves and discount the importance of doing some things alone. The following are a few ideas to help overcome the inevitable feelings of aloneness that will come up during the separation from your partner:

plan a life for yourself outside of your distance relationship

create an active life with friends – this may include renewing past friendships

return to hobbies that used to provide enjoyment (cooking, knitting, ceramics)

try a new sport or resume one that you previously found challenging and fun

indulge yourself by visiting a spa

workout at a gym

volunteer by reaching out to others

try a creative outlet such as painting, writing in a journal, or taking a dance class

visit a new restaurant – you can always order it as “take out”

do something by yourself or with a friend that your partner would not normally enjoy doing

delve into areas of interest that you have previously not found the time for

find a companion who can also serve as an advisor – particularly if this person is also in a distance relationship so that similar backgrounds and feelings can be shared and understood

By keeping an active life style while separated from your partner, you will benefit in several ways – you will come across as a more interesting and fun person to be around, and will find yourself able to contribute and share with more depth when you do get together with your loved one.

Although loneliness can accompany you for some of the ride, your long distance relationship should not suffer as a result. There are many ways to deal with these feelings and by doing so, it will help you become a more compelling and exceptional partner!

Get Your Girlfriend Back Fast – Why You Cannot Convince Her To Come Back To You

I want you to think about something for a minute here. I want you to really think about how much it hurts to know that you and your girlfriend have broken up. Think about what it will feel like when you hear it through the grapevine that she is now dating someone else. Do you want to just let this happen, or are you READY to do something about it so that you DO get her back?

When a relationship ends, men come up with one idea and they usually stick to it. And it is the WRONG idea. That idea is, they try to convince their ex girlfriend to take them back. Whether it is through writing a letter, trying to get her to talk on the phone or through text messages, most guys will try to go the route of using logic to convince their ex girlfriend on why she should take them back.

And you know what?

It almost NEVER works. I would be pleasantly surprised if it even worked 10 percent of the time. You need a better strategy, and you need to really know WHY it is that you cannot convince your ex girlfriend to take you back through LOGICAL reasoning.

FEMALE ATTRACTION IS EMOTIONAL…

If you try to speak “logic” to your ex girlfriend, it is kind of like trying to speak Spanish to someone that only understands Russian. There is no common ground there, really. See, women, they way that they are attracted to a man, is almost all about emotions. And men, they try to repair a relationship through logic.

Do you SEE the disconnection there?

When you are trying to convince a woman to take you back, the message is falling on deaf ears. She is not feeling what you are saying, and the more and more that you talk to her and try and make her take you back, the stronger that disconnection becomes. And it will ultimately lead to her NEVER coming back to YOU.

WHAT SHOULD YOU DO TO GET YOUR GIRLFRIEND BACK?

You need to know how to trigger the right emotions in your ex girlfriend. You need to know how to use the female psychology of attraction to make it become YOUR best friend, and make her start to FEEL a certain way when she thinks of YOU. This is how you are going to plant the seed of desire and make her WANT to get back with you.

Useful Tips About Relationship Issues

Many times our self esteem can be directly related to our relationship with someone. It doesn’t matter is it’s a marriage or we are dating. We hope a relationship will bring out the best in us but sometimes we find it is the root of our issues.

We always hope to find the person we dream to be the one we will be with forever, but it does not always work out that way. There can be conflict that goes on between the couple and you have to find out what the issue is.

Is this issue something that has originated from some problem between the two of you or did one of you bring a problem from a previous relationship into the new? It can be stressful trying to find the root of the problem but it is necessary if the two of you want to resolve the problem you are having.

Reading self help books can help you understand how to use different techniques to fix your relationship. It may not be easy to fix things, but if the two of you are really in love you should be making an all out effort.

If your relationship has been a strong one, you should have a good partner to help overcome problems you may have brought to your new relationship. They should be willing to endure whatever issue you may have to overcome and with their help you may find that your new relationship will grow stronger.

Try your best not to criticize each other over things, this can only make things worse, be constructive not destructive. Criticism will only make a person feel less of themselves or even less of the person criticizing. Don’t create a power struggle between the two of you; this will create an atmosphere that will never allow you to resolve your issues.

If you have experienced a relationship problem and would like to discover how to get past the heartache or learn how to make up and save your relationship before a break up happens, there are many proven methods that can help.

My Boyfriend is Not Loyal to Me 6 Means to Fix Unfaithfulness Problem

My lover is not Loyal to Me “, a girl assumed. Before you tell the break up idea and shatter her feelings more, attempt to advise these six steps to salvage the mutual understanding.

Your closest colleague whos sitting right in front of you, broke the news of unexpected betrayal. It was obvious she was trying to hold back the painful tears of unfaithfulness. Feeling angered, you wanted to convince her to dump him but that was quite harsh to tell to someone who puts so much hope in a relationship. So you thought of alternatives that would iron things out for her.

Feel the pain.

When someone you love fools around, you either get so disappointed it hurts you or so mad it hurts you still. The bottom line is theres no way of escaping the pang of disloyalty. Instead of refusing to admit it, acknowledge its within you. Sob your heartaches out, write every letter of pain in your diary and yes, you may show that sad look on your face. Not recognizing the anguish wont get you to the solution of the problem.

Dont put yourself down.

The issue may affect your self-esteem and it may cause self-pity. When feelings like these tend to develop, give yourself some respect, the value that he should have observed in your relationship. Stop thinking somebody else deserves his affection because of your flaws. Blaming yourself solely for his dissatisfaction will only hinder you from evaluating events and facts.

Have a break.

When youre not prepared to see your partner yet, do something else to reinvigorate yourself. An old hobby, a hilarious movie or a good read might temporarily ease your misery. But be reminded that prolonging this wont solve the real issue. If you continue presenting yourself in an unaffected mode, he might take advantage of your tolerance and make the situation worse.

Make the confrontation healthy.

The boyfriend-is-cheating-on-me matter wont be resolved by snooping over his emails or text messages to prove what hes guilty of. Without attacking him or defending yourself, discuss what the problem really is. Stay calm during your conversation and buckle up your maddened spirit in the backseat. He must elaborate the factors why he strayed. He will only tell you if you look calm enough to understand. Addressing the behavior and not the person will help you deal with the problem objectively.

Make decisions.

If your boyfriend asks for forgiveness for the hurt he has caused you, dont just let him promise he will never do such mistake again. Ask him to make decisions to strengthen your relationship. Emphasize that doing the same old habits will only put your relationship on the rocks and will not do you any good. He should give details of his appointments and the people hes meeting. As he talks, listen to his words and the underlying intentions. If he isnt, dont let him pull your legs once more.

Rebuild trust.

Regaining lost trust has never been easy. Once your boyfriend two-times you, its just difficult to have faith in him again. Time plays a great factor in healing the wound. You will recover faster though if hes always true to his words in his second chance. If the past continuously haunts you, try to focus on his positive side and your wonderful memories together. Nothing can be done with the past but your heart has instincts whether he deserves your regained trust or not.

When your buddy says, “My boyfriend is cheating on me,” she is certainly having a hard time. Listen to her as she relay the heartbreaking story and remind her that raising the middle finger in anger and kicking him out of her life are not the only alternatives. Who knows, giving him a chance to make up for his stupid mistake might lead your relationship to a stronger path.